marriage

Tuesday’s Tip: Take the Roadmap Challenge (Part 2)

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Well, it’s been a week since I introduced the first part of the challenge. Did you try it? How did it go? Did you notice anything about your spending habits? Were you surprised by anything? Many times we’re shocked by how much we spend. We don’t realize that those ‘little things’, the inexpensive items we buy on a whim, can actually add up to quite a bit when it happens on a regular basis. Think about what you saved in one week – and now imagine that on a slightly grander scale . . .

Which leads me to the next part of the challenge, in three steps.

Step 1: Take a good, hard look at your expense log from the past week. Is there anything you could stand to cut back on or do without? (Answer HONESTLY!!!) You may find that there are a couple of things on your list. That’s ok.

Step 2: Pick just ONE thing on your list and cut it out for the next 30 days. April 1 – 30. One month.

Step 3: Keep track of how much you save over the course of the next month.

I’m not asking you to give up every extra expense, just one. Pick one that’s the most frequent purchase. Or maybe one that’s the most unhealthy. Or the most expensive one. Whichever one you pick, do without it for the next month. On April 30, take the amount of money you saved and multiply it by 12 to see how much you can save in a year. Then ask yourself, What else could I do with that money? Pay down debt? Make an extra payment on something?? Pay something off???

Once you’ve done that, contact me and let me know what you cut out of your spending, how much you saved in a month, how much you’d save in a year, and what you learned from the experience. If you do, you’ll be entered into the contest and you could win a FREE consultation with me. You’ll get the Money Roadmap package which includes my book, a binder, and ledger paper, plus I will help you set up your own Roadmap and teach you how to use it.

There it is. The Roadmap Challenge. Try it. What do you have to lose? More importantly, what could you gain with good money management??

Good luck! I know you can do it! I can’t wait to hear from you!

Today is April 1st. Ready . . . set . . . GO!

Tuesday’s Tip: Count Your Blessings

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New Year’s Eve: easily one of the most anticipated days of the year – or one of the most dreaded. Whether we’re bidding a fond ‘farewell’ to great times or saying ‘good riddance’ to memories we’d rather forget, we tend to spend this time reflecting on the events of the past year before we look ahead to whatever awaits us during the year to come. And it isn’t always easy.

For me, I belong to the group of people who would like to tie up 2013 in a trash bag and throw it on the curb. It can rot in the dump alongside 2012. My family and I have endured enough heartache and loss in two years to last us for quite a while, so I suppose we’re hoping not necessarily for a prosperous or wonderful year, but maybe just one that doesn’t beat us up so much. And I know I’m not alone. Many people feel this way. It’s a little frightening to wonder what life has in store for us in the new year after all we’ve been through.

But as much as I might like to wash 2013 down the drain, I must also show a little gratitude for what the struggles have revealed to me. My friends supported me, even when I was at my worst. I’ve grown closer to others in my family. I appreciate and enjoy my children more. My marriage is stronger than ever. My feelings about what’s really important in life have changed for the better. And I’ve survived, which tells me I’m tougher than I thought.

So, I’m thinking that instead of feeling sorry for myself as I ring in 2014, maybe I’ll rummage through 2013, keep what I need, and toss the rest. Then I’ll start fresh in the morning and take it as it comes, grateful for all that I have. I’m not saying that I won’t grieve or feel sadness or anger, but I just won’t let it consume me. I’ll have another New Year’s Eve whenever I need it, take stock of the good stuff, get rid of the bad, and keep going.

I’m not one for making New Year’s resolutions, but maybe counting my blessings every once in a while is a good start . . .

Tuesday’s Tip: Love is Free

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I’m normally not one to openly broadcast the events in my life, but I feel compelled to bend that rule a bit today. I hope you’ll understand . . .

On Sunday October 28, my mom was rushed into emergency surgery to repair a ruptured abdominal aortic aneurism. She surprised everyone by surviving the ordeal and a second surgery the next day to remove a blood clot in her leg. She fought valiantly for a week and a half, but infection and other complications finally proved to be too much for her and she passed away on Wednesday November 7. And just a few days later I had to say goodbye to the most incredible woman I’ve ever known.

When I think of her, I think of all the things that made her who she was. She was patient (tolerant!), kind, and generous beyond belief. She had a wicked sense of humor, an infectious smile that bordered on impish, and a passion for life. She was down-to-earth and had an amazing ability to make everyone around her feel special. She was a dedicated wife to my dad (they were joined at the hip for all of their 54 years together) and she was, of course, a very loving mom to my sister, brother, and me as well as a wonderful grandmother to all eight who called her “Nana”.

I know she loved us not because she told us all the time; I know it because she showed us.

Her love was in all the meals she made from scratch, from spaghetti sauce and cranberries to cinnamon rolls and Julekage. It was in the handmade Halloween costumes, cross stitched gifts for just about every occasion from housewarming to anniversaries, and the knitted caps for babies in impoverished countries around the world. She showed how much she cared by volunteering in the kitchen on Bingo night, stuffing stockings for soldiers overseas, and taking care of the finances for a community organization. She golfed for charity, could answer just about any computer software question you threw at her, coached youth bowling, and brought the best kinds of sweets to the monthly dinner meetings that made the guys get dessert first (just to make sure they got some!). She chaperoned school functions and class parties, and waited up nights until she was sure we got home safely, which also meant punishing us for breaking the rules. She loved us enough to set us free (even though it broke her heart), then welcomed us home without judgment when it didn’t work out. She gently, but firmly, raised us to be considerate, compassionate human beings. She knew when to give us advice, when to hold back, and when to just hold us and let us cry. She hugged her grandkids every chance she got. She quickly recognized people for a job well done. She kept us grounded and humble while, at the same time, lifting us up, supporting us in all our endeavors.

Her love was in everything she did and said. And for that I am truly grateful.

I’ve long since believed (thanks to Mom) that we should let the people we love know that we love them – all the time. Love isn’t something to be saved only for special occasions like birthdays, holidays, or anniversaries. It’s something to be shared on a daily basis, or at least as often as you can, in whatever way that you can. And I don’t mean with gifts and material things – I mean with simple words and actions.

Whose heart doesn’t flutter when her boyfriend tells her how great she looks in those jeans? What guy doesn’t feel special when his wife surprises him with his favorite meal for no reason in particular? How about when a child’s parents tell him how totally proud they are of him just for finishing the race? Or when a friend takes the time to listen to you vent, and does so without judging or advising? Or maybe doing something kind for a complete stranger? Or bringing a meal to someone in need? Or showing up to lend support to a friend?

Our words and actions have a greater impact on others than we realize. There are countless ways we can show our love, concern, and compassion for others. A few take some effort. Most take little effort at all. And yet those “little” things are what people remember the most . . .